I'll be in trouble for this one

First let me give my usual disclaimer: please don't read if you're eating dinner, easily grossed out, or don't find any of my other stories amusing. 

Someone I know recently had a colonoscopy. I will leave names out and we will just call her M.

M. did the prep on a Friday. I get a text from M. while I'm at work on Friday night that says, "done crapped in my wiener dog pjs."

As if that isn't bad enough, when I texted to see how the procedure went, I get the following story.

After the colonoscopy is over, M. decides she is starving. In case you don't know the drill, to prepare for a butt check, you don't eat the prior day-just drink a prep and sit on the crapper for hours upon hours. Hence the destruction of the wiener dog pjs.

Anyway, M. makes her ride take her to Denny's. After the food arrives, M. says she is going to go to the bathroom to barf. Before M. can move, she projectile vomits all over her clothes, her ride's clothes, and both their plates. Not only that, but her ride tells me she has vomit hanging in her hair and on her face, yet she is so doped up she is worried about wiping up the table first.

The best part of the story comes when the waitress, who was clearly a little slow and unobservant, asks M.'s ride "would you like a box for your food?"

This is one of the best stories I've ever heard. I wish I would have been there. I miss all the good stuff.